Military training teaches you to be ready for action, prepared for every eventuality and to plan for the worst. But loss is something you can't prepare for. With no orders on how to deal with loss and grief, it can feel very lonely and overwhelming.

Military culture promotes acts of selflessness for the protection of others in serving their country and fighting against wrongdoing. But when you're unable to protect your military buddies, or others you care for, it can leave you feeling helpless.

Many veterans would sacrifice themselves to protect the lives of others, particularly their military buddies. Surviving where others have not can therefore be difficult to come to terms with.

It's not uncommon to feel guilty or somehow responsible, often unfairly.

There is a greater risk that military losses occur in traumatic circumstances, which can make grieving a loss particularly complex and difficult. Many veterans who are grieving lost comrades also have PTSD. Processing the grief can therefore be blocked by the way the memory of the event was captured at the time, and frequent intrusions or flashbacks to the event now.

All emotions are heightened when grieving. There may be some emotions that you are not used to feeling or don't recognise. Emotions are not readily talked about in the military meaning that talking about grief can be particularly tough. This can lead to veterans coping by burying their feelings or numbing them with drink or drugs, making it impossible for the loss to be fully processed.

Feelings of loss can also happen when you leave the military. Commonly, losing the military family, the sense of companionship and comradery can all bring about a loss of identity and similar feelings to grief – particularly for those who have left under difficult circumstances.

Before you move on, take a moment to reflect on what you have read so far. Note what relates to you personally.